Body Autonomy and The Rights of Women are GONE

Firstly, I need to say that I personally am beyond angry and disappointed with the system, the country, the courts, the government, and the entire population of this horrible place.  I vacillate between anger and despair.  I have heard this from my sisters of another mother over and over since the ruling came down.  Ok. we were supposed to have some time to get used to it with the leak but it hit like a ton of bricks. If one more person says I should be OK with this because we knew it was coming I will scream.  To consider that I no longer have control over my body makes me physically nauseous,  and the decisions leave me without one word that would truly describe my feelings.  I am a wash with anger, frustration, resentment, a feeling of being dominated, sadness, depression, and on and on and on.  

I grew up in Canada, thankfully, and know that this is not the way society has to be.  We don't have to live in fear of our schools being shot up, or in fear of someone blowing us away in a mad traffic moment. You don't have to live without respect for your bodily autonomy, without healthcare, without maternity leave, and without decent respect and compassion for each other.  Yet that is 100% where the USA is today. 

Let's talk about Abortion.  I have had one and I am thankful that my country of birth, Canada, had free, safe, accessible abortion available when I needed it.  I could tell you that I was young, not ready to have a kid, in a relationship with an abusive man who was an alcoholic and after 7 years would even commit to having the child.  Yet, regardless of any of that, the reality is it is my body, my choice, and none of anyone's fucking business why I had an abortion.  

Now I'm being told that my body is not mine.  I don't have control over it.  The same Republicans who did this are the ones that used bodily autonomy as a reason not to get a vaccine and thus prolonging the pandemic and causing the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people and the destruction of the economy.  They said their body was their choice.  They did not want a simple shot in the arm that could have made a huge difference.  Now they say 'oh you don't get to decide if you have a baby'.  A baby for fucks sake.  A baby that you will have to raise for the rest of your life, or give away to strangers and feel that pain for the rest of your days.  

In Missouri, within 15 minutes the trigger clause was executed and the right to privacy and bodily autonomy was taken away.  In Missouri, abortion is only permitted for medical emergencies, with no exceptions for rape, or incest. A healthcare provider that is found in violation can be imprisoned for 5 to 15 years and have their medical license revoked.  It burden of proof is on the physician to persuade the state as to why they needed to do the procedure.  Many hospitals and medical associations are forbidding any procedures due to liability.  Religiously, Christian, affiliated hospitals will not do any procedures. 

Missouri first outlawed abortion in 1825 and that law is still on the books.  In Missouri "unborn children have all the qualities and attributes of adult human persons differing only in age or maturity. Medically, human life is a continuum from conception to death."  Case after case in Missouri law states that human life starts at conception. It even states "the laws of this state shall be interpreted and construed to acknowledge on behalf of the unborn child at every state of development, all the rights, privileges, and immunities available to other person, citizens and residents of this state." In 2019 section 188.010 was enacted "In recognition that Almighty God is the author fo life, that all men and women are 'endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are life." into Missouri's constitution. 

So what happens if you miscarry.  I know many women that have dealt with many miscarriages in the process of trying to have a child.  One of my friends has had 9 miscarriages and keeps trying.  Now when a woman has a miscarriage she can't go to the hospital without fear of persecution.   The attendant on duty gets to decide if that woman is having a self-inflicted miscarriage vs one that was caused by "GOD".  That woman then can face being charged with murder as that concept of a baby has more rights in Missouri than the pregnant woman does.  The medical staff in the hospital has to decide if they dare help this woman or not bother as she is a "sinner".  They also get to decide if they will take on the liability of helping this person.  Will they go to jail.  I have a friend that works in labor and delivery in the hospital and she told me that when a woman comes in with a miscarriage there are nurses, surgery techs, and physicians that will not do the procedure and they have to wait for someone to come in that will.   This was before the law changed.  What will it be like now?  

Now let's cover self-inflected abortions.  I have been to several rallies in the last few days and each time some strong woman gets up and starts talking about how on the world health website there are instructions on how to give yourself an abortion.  Seriously, that is where we are at.  I have to sit there with a knitting needle and try to pierce my own cervix trying to end my pregnancy.  Or I have to use a suction device and a tube and put that tube into my cervix myself and then operate some pump to suck out the contents of my uterus.   Or maybe I should just grab a hanger, straighten it and start jabbing into my crotch hoping I don't kill myself in the process.    The fact that women are being asked to do this casually is insane.  If men were being told to stuff a hanger up their urethra this would not be happening. These poor women are going to die in back allies, in their beds, and in hospitals. They will die in horrible pain, in horrible conditions, and for what?  Hell, I don't even want to cut my own toenails never mind sticking something in my vagina to stop a pregnancy.

Will women go to jail in Missouri for having an abortion? While the bill does not currently allow for prosecution of the woman who has the abortion that may not be the case for a self-inflicted abortion. If you have a medically necessary one they will not prosecute you but they may prosecute the doctor. If you do it yourself you could be liable based on the above quotes of when Missouri decides life begins. We have yet to see how this will be interpreted by the Missouri judicial system and courts.   

A woman who has a non-viable pregnancy now can not terminate that pregnancy.  They can't end a horrible situation. They have to go through months and months of horrible suffering and eventually full labor.  If you believe that a fetus is a life why put it through that suffering only to die as it matures.   In Missouri, a medical emergency is defined as the following  "A condition which, based on reasonable medical judgment, so complicates the medical condition of a pregnant woman as to necessitate the immediate abortion of her pregnancy to avert the death of the pregnant woman or for which a delay will create a serious risk of substantial and irreversible physical impairment of a major bodily function of the pregnant woman.”   A woman, a couple, or a family no longer has the choice to end a horrible situation of suffering and pain.  They have to continue with the physical, mental, and financial struggles to go through with a pregnancy that will scare everyone for life.  The only way to terminate it is to avert death or impairment of major bodily function.   This is criminal. In the bill it does not allow for Mental health to justify an abortion it must be "physical" in nature. 

People say just take the morning-after pill.  Well, there are several pill options out there. If you catch it early enough and can actually access the pill you might be lucky.  But there are some issues here:  

1. Doctors will not prescribe it.
2. Pharmacies will not fill the prescriptions.
3. Money may not be available for it. 
4. It only is guaranteed to work on women who weigh less than 155 lbs.  Yes, you read that correctly.   It will not work at all on women over 175 lbs.  Apparently, less than 50% of women under 29 are less than 155 lbs. with 40% in the 30 -39-year-old and 37% in the 40 - 49 years.  So less than half of women in any age group could use this pill successfully if they could get it. 
5. Many women can't have it mailed to them because they can't privately access their mail.  Maybe they can't tell their parents or roommates about the situation.  
6. Another issue with the pill is that many States like Missouri are trying to make it illegal to get the pill by mail. They are trying to make that illegal to limit yet again the access to this medication.  While President Biden said he would defend this right we see little chance of it as states move forward on this plan. 

So who are the women we are talking about?  

• Young girls in high school that just happened to go to gathering with friends only to find themselves raped in the basement.  
• Young girls that were hanging out with their Uncle, or parents' friends, that just happen to like to molest children.  
• Daughters that are raped by their fathers.  
• Women that go to a party and men who "just like beer" like one of the justices on this decision, that rape them and deny it so they can be on the surpreme court and take away our rights. 
• Women who are not ready to have a child. 
• Women who can't afford to have a child.  
• Women who are knocked up and the men take zero responsibility.  
• Women who are in poverty will have yet another child they can't afford to pay for or love.  
• Women who are older and thought they were in menopause find themselves pregnant in their 50s.  
• Women who have a nonviable fetus growing in their bodies that not make it to birth or will die as soon as they are born.  
• Young women who got pregnant have to choose if they will be a child themselves or have one. 
• Your Mom, Sisters, Daughters, and Partners. 

We settled this so many years ago. No one was forcing anyone to have an abortion.  If you don't want one or don't believe in having one no one was forcing you.  Yet now we are being forced not to.  

Here are some abortion facts for you: 

1. 6 in 10 women who have abortions already have children. 
2. 43% of abortions are in the first 6 weeks of pregnancy
3. 57% of abortions are for women in their 20's.  
4. 9% of abortions are for women under 20 years old 
5. 34% of abortions are for women 30 and above. 
6. 41% of women who have abortions have attended some college. 
7. 49% of women who have abortions are below the poverty line.
8. 58% of women who have abortions have not had a previous one.
9. 46% of women who have abortions are not married. 
10. 56% of abortions are surgical with the rest being medically induced. 
11. 38% of women who have abortions are Non-Hispanic Black (12.4% of the population, 19.5% in poverty)
12. 33 % of women who have abortions are Non-Hispanic White (57.8 % of the population, 8.3% in poverty)
13. 21 % of women who have abortions are Hispanic (18.7% of the population, 15.7% in poverty)

So now what do we do?  At the rallies and over the last few days I have been hearing about people being willing to help take women to other states to get abortions.  We can go to Illinois and get one there.  For now, we can go to Kansas and get one.  However, there is a vote on August 2nd to close down that right in Kansas so that might be short-lived.  According to the speakers at the rallies, if we want to help out in this way we can't bring our cell phones with us when we leave the state or we can be tracked and criminally or civilly charged for helping in this way. Some states, like Texas, encourage people to "report" women for having abortions so they can be charged and the reporter can get a monetary reward for doing their 'civic' duty. Missouri is in the process of putting a law to mirror this one. They say to get a burner phone to use on these journeys so you can't be identified as helping.  What kind of a world is it when you can't take a drive to another state without risking jail time or financial ruin.  Do you have to keep your trader joe bills when you go to St. Louis to prove I was only going to good "GOD approved jounries?"

What is next ... Birth Control.  They want to make it illegal to get birth control.   What the hell kind of back-ass place is this.  Do they really want every baby possible born?  If so they should outlaw jerking off.  All those potential babies ending up in the garbage can or toilet... we cant' have that.  Oh, I forget, that is limiting men and that is not an option in this country.  The reality is they don't want maternity care, maternity leave, social services, support for educational costs, support for daycare costs, etc.  All they want is to see women suffer and put in their place.  Black women, brown women, white women, any and all women put in their place, under control, and in poverty.  There it is.  The rich white controlling men will go about their business and have their mistresses carted off to a legal state to get an abortion and will go about their hypocritical lives.  

I am angry but I am also informed.  I do not come to this anger easily and I can't seem to let it go.   I have two children, both boys.  Some people say to me you are too old for this to affect you, and you have boys, so what does it matter.  It matters a great deal. Firstly my sons could easily get someone pregnant.  That is how it happens you know.  There is a dude involved in all these preganies.   Secondly, it does not matter if I am too old to have a child, it is my body and it is 100% wrong.  

To the women that are happy with these decisions... I have great disdain for you.  I hope you personally live to rue the day you were so evil as to take away the rights from your sisters and daughters.   I know many of you feel this little thrill of being dominated and put in your place by a man.  If you want that so bad go join an S&M group and get it out in the open.  Your fetish should not be my law.   For those of you that think your "God" is making this right, well you are wrong.  Your "God" gave you the ability to make up your mind and the ability to have a choice.  Your "God" may want you to prove yourself to them with dogma and control and you can only do that if you have a choice.  Without choice, you can't prove yourself as a good "religious person".  So if this offends you I don't care.  I don't care in the least as you once again put yourself on the opposite side of right, compassion, and history I hope.  

For those of my sisters that want to help we need to help. We need to dig into our anger and come out with strength.  Sitting around saying, oh well, will do nothing.  We need to donate to abortion funds, we need to volunteer to drive people. We need to tell our stupid evil legislators that we are not going to take this sitting down.  We need to volunteer for candidates that will usher in change.  We need to be there and vote.  We need to help our women in any way we can to have control over their reproductive rights.  We need to tell our daughters that this is not the way life should be.  

We need to let people who do not support reproductive rights know that they did this and we will not just be OK and go on as friends.  If you don't like what I say unfriend, unfollow, delete my contact, forget my name, and don't bother to try to talk to me about other things and pretend it is all ok. IT IS NOT OK! I am not OK.  I will not be ok with this ever!  I am not owned by any man, government, or control fact.  I am a woman, I am strong.  I own my body and I will go to great lengths to make sure other women do too.  Be Warned!

If You are Unvaccinated You Need To Take Responsibility

I have not written in a long long time and I am disgruntled as Fuck.  I am so so so angry.  It is August 4th a year and a half into this pandemic.  I have not written because I knew if I opened the flood gates I would not only piss off a bunch of people, I would find it hard to contain my discontent.  

So here we are 21 months into this shit and still, the same group of people is responsible for the extent of this problem, keeping us here and continuing on the demise of the human race.  Now if you are not vaccinated you can stop reading now if you like, you can unfriend me, block me, do what you must.  The reality is you are to blame.  You are the problem here.   YES, if you are the unvaccinated, unmasked person you have a responsibility here and have failed our world and the human race.  Sorry if this is a little harsh but frankly you are to blame!

When this started you cried about your right to not wear a mask. God forbid you should put a mask on your mouth and nose to block the intake and outgoing of a virus.  God forbid you should take care of your fell person in the space with you.  You decided that your right to spread disease and intake disease is more important than other people's health and life.   

There is a concept in philosophy called the Categorical Imperative and it comes from Kantian Ethics.  When you buckle up your seat belt you are obeying the categorical imperative.  You may or may not agree that wearing a seat belt saves lives. You may or may not want a ticket.  You may know people who have been injured or died because they were not wearing a seat belt.  There are even some folks that may be been injured by the seat belt.  The same argument can be made for airbags.  Airbags may blow up in your face causing burns or other damage.  However, they will stop you from bashing your fool head on the dashboard of your car.  You follow these rules because they are for the greater good of the greater number of people.  You are willing to sacrifice your comfort for the greater good.   

So here we are with this virus ravishing our world. Now you may want to argue that the world has not been ravished. Maybe you don't 'know anyone who has died.  Maybe you, by the grace of God or whatever powers that be, don't even know anyone who got seriously ill.  Yet in the USA alone, at this point, we have had over 610,000 people die and over 4.2 Million worldwide.  With an average daily case of 92,000 in the USA alone.  Our little college town has a huge problem.  We have had positive rates of 30% with higher rates of transmission than the city of Toronto with 5 million people.  

I as an individual have lost friends, family and know 100's of people who have had it.   I know people that lost parents, children, and lovers.  I know people that are so damaged from this that 8 months after getting out of the hospital they are still on oxygen.   I know people that have developed all sorts of related conditions post covid.   This is not a joke.  This is not the simple flu.  This is not something to take chances with.  

I now know 10's of people how have had breakthrough cases even after vaccination.  While their chances of getting it are much lower and their chances of complications are also low this would not be happening at this rate if people had gotten vaccinated. There would be a lot fewer hosts of the virus and a lot less transmission.  I fear we have missed our chance to control this by the arrogance of the people that will not get vaccinated. This makes me really furious and the next variant is mutating through this willing group of hosts as I type.  

Others and I have lost their livelihoods to this.  We spent five years building two businesses that have been devastated by this pandemic.  People have lost their ability to work safely and have had to go to great lengths just to keep moving forward.  Restaurants have closed, stores have gone out of business, people have lost their jobs to take care of kids learning virtually and overall it has been a shit show.

Then there are the kids that have lost their schooling.  My oldest had not senior year in high school. Remember back to all those pivotal things that happened in your senior year of high school.  OK erase them all.  How does that feel?     He was just getting some traction socially when the pandemic hit and he did not see anyone for 15 months.  He is an introvert so he focused on online schooling and kicked butt.  But he missed out on a lot.  My youngest son missed out on middle school.  Now as he says it 'No one finishes middle school and wishes they had more middle school.".  But again think back to the pivotal things you learned about yourself, relationships, social functions, and life during those middle school years. Now he has to learn all that fast and furious in high school, assuming that can happen safely.

Then there are those that have lost their minds.   Don't belittle this.  People are not the same. They see others as infected, they don't know how to be in public again.  They don't feel safe doing the simplest tasks of life.  They can't get back to earning a real living because of fear and depression.  Most people have felt this during this pandemic.  They can't gather with friends and family.  They morn those they lost and protectively shelter those they care about to a point of repression. This is not OK. This is not healthy and has been pretty much ignored. 

Businesses forced employees to come back to work without any counseling or support for this transition.  Unemployment was cut off by conservative ruled States to force people back into minimum wage jobs dealing directly with an unreliable public. The poor health care workers are all but used up. They are leaving the profession in droves, scared by what they have felt and seen.  I have a friend that works in labor and delivery and has had to cut 10's of babies out of women's body on ventilators trying to save the babies as the mom's body shuts down.  I have friends in nursing that have gone numb to the death, sadness, and deprivation they see every day.  They are furious and have every right to be so.   

I have not seen my family in almost 2 years.  Yes, that is two years without hugging my aging parents, 2 years where they have continued to age without the joy of physically seeing my children.  Two years of not seeing family for fear of killing vulnerable people.  Two years where I could not even cross the border into the country of my birth because of the bad behavior of 50% of the American population.  

Now one could say that fear is holding me back.  That I could do all that I want if only I would let go of fear.  However, I say it is my responsibility to the human race that holds me back.  As I type this I am missing another networking event.  The success of my business and our ability to earn a living hinges on networking, yet I can't do it.  I can't go and be in a room with people enclosed.  The reason I can't go is not that I will not wear a mask and do all the necessary things to protect myself, it is because I can not trust that the other people there will do their due diligence.  I can't know who is vaccinated and who is running amuck. 

Every day I find out about more people that are not vaccinated.  Some have valid excuses about being sick and vulnerable and for those, I have some compassion.  Many of the excuses however do not weigh the damage they are doing in their hesitance.  By not getting vaccinated these people are leaving a place for the vaccine to fester, mutate and come back to get us all.  They do not look at the big picture of what the right thing to do, for the common good of us all.   The virus will have hosts to go to and will mutate.  If they only wore masks when they were told to, if they only got vaccinated when they were told to, we would not be seeing the surge we are now. We would be able to travel safely, have family gatherings, bar mitzvahs, weddings, dinners,  etc.  

When our younger son got vaccinated we thought we were free.  We thought we could go about our lives.  Four about three weeks we celebrated, made plans, and even booked travel. Then the next surge it.  We could continue to go about our lives but for some reason, we give a shit about spreading this virus to the arrogant unvaccinated people in our community. We don't want to get it, but even if we do the vaccine will help us not get it as bad.  Yet we now curtail our lives again because of the same people that would not wear masks and arrogantly tell us they don't need to be vaccinated now.  We curtail our lives to save yours.  We curtail our activities to do our part in keeping this virus from mutating again and again and coming back and killing us all.   

I had this discussion with a dear friend that will not get vaccinated.  I told her this would cause a surge and that I prayed it did not come back to hurt more people.  Yet, she remains unvaccinated and the world slips further into mayhem.  We have no mask mandate, no restrictions on behavior, no mass testing, no persuasions, no occupancy limits, no travel restrictions, and no sense it would seem.  How do you think this will progress?  Even at the peak of the rules, we could hardly contain this thing and now we are the epicenter of the country.  

So, this may not change your mind and frankly, you probably did not even read this far if you are not vaccinated. You probably chalked me up as one of those crazy liberal snowflakes.  However, I am calling you out.  You are the Problem. You are selfish, arrogant, and are responsible.  

How the Lack of Wage Pressure is Keeping us Down.

Why do I feel so edge, I ask myself on a regular basis.  My children ask me why I am mad all the time.  I ask myself if there is some hidden secret that is making me mad.  The reality is that a lot of things are making me mad.  I have to accept that it is OK to be stressed.  I am not a freak of nature.  I am angry, stressed, tired and frankly disenchanted. 

I used to look at the life we had here in the mid-west and see advantages and the beautiful of simplicity.  The average person and average family could get ahead. They could have a quality of life, a nice home, some money in the bank and even the occasional vacation.   Sure, stuff happened now and again but most people could weather the average storm. 

Now it is different.  With almost 50 years with no upward wage pressure and continued increased in cost of living the average family is not longer in a sweet spot.  There is no average families left.  I am not saying there are no families that are doing well and don't really feel a change, as those exist.  I am also not saying there are no families in desperate need.  The reality is there are more folks that are just getting by or are digging themselves further and further into debt then ever before.

One of the main reasons for this is the lack of upward wage pressure.  When the recession happened folks were freaked out but knew that, like all market trends, it would even out eventually.  The problem is that this is not a market trend or a recession. This is the evolution of capitalism as we know it.  This is the norm. This is abuse of the very factor of production, labor.

When I first moved to Columbia I was able to get an entry level job at the University making $11 an hour.  I had a university degree from a prestigious school and a couple years of business experience.  At the time this made me crazy.  I was disgusted as I had made more money slicing deli meat in a unionize grocery store in my youth.  Yet I accepted it as the way things were.  Now 22 years later, the same job would be going for the same $11 a hour here and someone would be happy to get it.   So there has been no wage pressure at all.  According to the CPI inflation calculator that wage should have gone up to $17.95 an hour.  The worker has no power to change this because desperation makes it impossible for them to do anything but take that $11 job and be happy they can at least keep up on their minimum payments. 

I am not OK with this.  I see the effect it has on the people around me.  Make American Great Again my ass.  American is not great, has not been great and will not be great until the worker has respect and the family unit can have a decent quality of life without desperation and need.  Giving money to the rich and powerful will not accomplish this goal. 

Expecting the average person to take on yet another part time job that does not provide benefits is not the answer.  People are not lazy they are angry.  They do not perceive fairness and opportunity. They do not know how to get beyond this wall. They are not ready to take on challenges or opportunities. They are not happy.

Here is a great example, the adjunct professor.  In my town, an adjunct professor will get paid $2,150 to $3,500 to teach a class, depending on which school they work for.   The average, non-research business faculty teaches 4 classes a semester for two semesters a year. According to the Chronicles of Higher Education that faculty member should be making $57,000 as an instructor and $87,000 as an assistant professor, plus benefits.  The per course rate should be between $7,125 and $10,875 per class.  Yet the adjunct professor that teaches 8 classes a year will make between $ $17,200 and $28,000 with no benefits or pension.  So the school saves tens of thousands of dollars by moving their full time positions to less expensive adjunct positions.  This leaves the highly educated adjunct professor below the poverty line. 

This example is not unusual.  This example is life.  It is corporations cutting costs and making due with less. It looks like smart business to the business leaders. It has not heart and no soul. It is not personal it is business. IT IS STILL WRONG!

So very disgruntled...

It has been a while since I have blogged here.  The political situation in this country is enough to drive someone to the moon and back.  I am obviously on the liberal side of most issues but not all.  I also have the unique perspective of having living in Canada till I was 26 and also having traveled extensively to other countries and cultures. 

I have stayed away from this blog because once I start going things are going to get real quick.  What the hell is going on in this country and in this world!!!   The balance is off, the apple cart is tipped over, the bulls are running through the streets and it is all running a muck.   

When I was in my early 20's I hated the Simpsons when my friends were watching it and laughing at ridiculousness of the characters. I was crying as I knew this was not just something to make fun of.  This was the real way many people acted and aspired to be.  Now we live in Idiocracy,  We live in a world so far beyond the Simpsons, South Park, King of the Hill and on and on as the bar for crude humor goes up and up and up.

We live in Trump's America where it is acceptable to show the lowest moral standards, to call strong and ethical Women Leaders Pocahontas. It is just fine to drag the reality of truth through the mud.  This is a world where the freedom of the press is in jeopardy and a woman's control of her body is in question.  This is a world without compassion where it is brother against brother with no room for ethics or sense.  This is a world where the "They" are an enemy. 

This is not the America I want to live in.  Each day I check the news sources to see the unraveling of the fabric of democracy.  Then I check the other sided news and see a different outlook on the same stores, some stories suspiciously missing while others appeal to a totally different base.  Somewhere in all of this is a network for greedy, rich, powerful and unscrupulous bastards that are getting fat on our stress and pain.

Yes, I am mighty disgruntled.  If you don't mind my ramblings, tense switches and typing snafus, you are welcome to come along for the ride.  Here she Blows!!!!!

Blogging Fun with Food Not Bought Blog and Heirloom Gardener

I am so excited to say I am blogging for Heirloom Gardener.  I started a blog called Food Not Bought.  Food Not Bought, is a blog that will cross over from the Ivan back and forth across the garden.  It will cover topics of the kitchen and how to build a pantry full of food not bought.  It will highlight this journey as well as focus on growing a productive suburban garden that really does add Food Not Bought to your table.

I hope you will join me on this Journey.  The first blogs are up and posted here.   http://www.heirloomgardener.com/blogs/food-not-bought

While, I have blogged over the years, I never really know if people liked my style, or appreciated my writing. It was a big deal to have someone one else, a magazine I respect, read and choose my work to post on their website. Now Heirloom Gardener has decided to take it a step farther and include some of my posts in the spring print edition.

Let me tell you a little story about a girl who was told she had no style and could not write.  I was always exceedingly bright but could not, for the life of me, excel in English.  I was diagnosed with Learning Disabilities by the 5th grade and spent many years being frustrated by limitations in reading and writing. When I grew up, we had no computers or spellcheck, we had type writers and finally graduated up to the first Macintosh computer by the time I was in University. The school programs for learning disabilities were extremely limited and did not encourage academic pursuits beyond getting by.

When I was in my final grade of high school I worked hard to get the minimum of a 65 in Honors English you needed to get into University.   I had an English teacher that had stated he did not like having students with LD in his class, and did not feel they should take honors English or preparing for University level educations.  This resulted in a personality conflict and a difficult situation for me.

As I failed assignment after assignment in English my fear of not getting into University increased.  I was lucky to have parents that fought for me.  They met with the principles and the result was that my work was to be double graded by others in the English department.  Quickly my grade returned into the range of a B.  This was not too shabby, but not at the top of the class.   English was admittedly not my strong suite.

It came to the final.  There was some sort of rule that only a person's teacher could grade their final.  Not sure what that was about but some how this teacher managed to make this happen.  He gave me a Zero on my Final.   I wrote 18 pages on that final.  The only way to get a Zero would have been to not show up.

So he managed to get my English grade down to a 64.  My parents flew into action again and there was a massive appeal and meetings.  Eventually my grade was raised to a 65 and the school administrators sent me on my way University bound.   While this was a victory, there was always that eco in my head of his voice.  Telling me I had no style and could not succeed.

Well now I would like to say thank you to Heirloom Gardeners and to the readers of my many blogs.  Thank you for getting my style and for enjoying my writing.  See you all again in blog land.

All Fridge and Nothing But the Fridge

Today I am going to ramble on about a fridge.   Well about a couple of fridges.

We have had several fridges over our married life and through raising the boys.  We had a lovely freezer at the bottom, European Style but it only lasted 6 years.  We had a nice traditional style that lasted 7 years.  Our most recent fridge was a small side by side that we absolutely hated.  We stuffed that thing so full and couldn't find anything.

Every timed my husband or I opened the fridge we would curse under our breath. We were like old Yiddisha yentas spitting and saying"I hate this fridge".  We had only had it for about one year.  Seriously, we were a year in and all the drawers were broken.  The plastic cracked and the drawers just didn't fit in anymore, they hung at weird angles and scraped open and close.  The fridges thin and deep shelves fostered a frenzy of crap all stuffed in leaving absolutely no viability at all.

I had been looking on facebook marketplace just sort of weighing it's capacity. You see, I do on-line marketing, so I sort of study these things. I was searching for fridges for obvious reasons. Not really certain I was about to spend any money on it.  Yet I searched anyway.

Then one day it showed up. It was a Danby Commercial All Fridge.  It was all fridge and nothing but the fridge.  It was all fridge, all day long.  It was 33 wide and 67 high. It weighted in at about 187 pounds.  It had 17.7 cubic feet of fridge space.  I just watched it and thought how this would solve our problem and be so great.   We were not really ready to give up the old fridge as we did need a freezer upstairs and had actually finally hooked up the ice maker.   So we would have to add this to our already crowded kitchen.

For someone that used their kitchen as much as I did, I had a very small kitchen.  I made the best of the space I had so the thought of adding a second fridge was a big deal.  Yet we dove in.  We talked it over and then made arrangements to see it.   We marveled at it's size and through of never having to say we hated our fridge again.  We decided to go for it.

They delivered it the next day and we got some friends to help us get it into the house.  I scrubbed the hell out of it.  It was supposedly cleaned but all I have to say is...vomit.  There is something about other peoples dirt or 'schmutch' that makes me want to toss my cookies.  After it was cleaned we just stared at it in awe.

My older son, Jordan, who is a vegan, claimed the old fridge as the land of no meat or milk.  The old fridge would become the land of parve, vegan tofu, tempe and almond products.  I was thrilled that I could help him satisfy his food preferences and not have to deal with disgust or temptation.

We started packing things in the fridge. My younger son, Joel, helped me with this task, really getting into organizing everything on the door.   We manged to move over just about everything from the old fridge, albeit for the vegan delights.  The fridge still looked roomy, beautiful frankly, just lovely. You could find anything you needed and lacked for no space.

There was plenty of space to fill, so I went grocery shopping.  I got lots of good food and still there was space. Next I went to the farmers market and got food for processing and making a fermentation. The recipe included beets, turnips, daikon radishes and a head of cabbage.  It would make enough to fill two half gallon jars when done.  I also got a rather large head of Endive for making a lovely soup.  I even picked up 6 dozen eggs as they were on sale.

The all fridge took all that food in and still looks fantastic. It was room and clean and functional. The door held all the sauces and inside there is space for everything. I felt so spoiled, absolutely spoiled.
So in review, I must say that an all fridge is a beautiful thing and that it is something that anyone who is a serious cook, caner and fermented should consider.  If you use your kitchen as I do, I highly recommend the all fridge for your sanity and for your happiness.

I got a big butt and I do not care...

Amy Jones may seem like your ordinary Mother of two in America today, and in many ways, she is.  Along with at least 40% of the population of people just like, her she has a problem that needed solving.  Research shows that a huge percentage of women have more booty than underwear.  Amy dedicated to solving this problem one pair at a time with Amy’s Underwear.

Amy’s Story was very similar to many of our own. She was born and raised in St. Louis. Her father owned a flooring business and instilled the values of hard work in her life at a young age. She was a gymnast in her youth and enjoyed a relatively active lifestyle. She enjoyed math and science in school, maintained a high GPA, and was a leader in the drama club.  She taught in her church, after graduation. Amy subsequently had two boys, now ages 8 and 10, and continued with a predictable path of American Life.

The big one difference in Amy's Story, and to benefit of women with big buts everywhere, was that she was surrounded by the concept that a problem deserved a solution and that entrepreneurial ventures were possible.  Amy described her husband as being a serial entrepreneur. Together they had started several businesses and lived the world of possibilities. Amy had the skills and the drive to make a difference.

The problem Amy decided to solve was the ever-present issue of ill-fitting underwear.  The more Amy considered the situation the more she realized she was not alone. She discovered that the current sizing charts for underwear were way out of date and out of shape. She also discovered that not a single manufacturer was making underwear for women with more booty.  Amy became energized with the concept of helping all women feel more comfortable and covered in their underwear.

Amy started with her personal research by going out and spending $500 on different types of underwear and trying everything on.  It turned out that none of them fit right, she has too much butt for the fabric provided.  They all ended up with the inevitable riding up feeling.  No underwear covered the situation well.  She could not wear underwear that was cute, or athletic or even comfortable.  Underwear that fit the booty invariably gaped at the waist, while those that fit the waist rode up and became a thong.

She started researching what the fashion world was doing about this problem. She found that a major jeans manufacture had done a survey of over 60,000 women from all around the world, and found that the issue was a difference between the low and high hip.  This was where the muscles of the buttocks hit.  The standard difference was 2.5 inches but the real difference, found by the survey, was a difference of 6 inches.

Amy never dreamed of being a fashion designer. She learned to sew when she was 8 years old to make her own costumes for Halloween. Never did she dream she would end up using her skills to try and save women from constant discomfort.  She began sewing prototypes, experimenting with different fabrics, elastics, and styles. She realized that her dream of having correctly fitted underwear was possible.

Amy worked on creating the prefect sizing chart.  This was a grueling process and involved hiring a patent attorney and expanding the categories to women’s sizing to include the tops as well as the bottoms.  Amy wanted to create a realistic sizing chart that manufactures could use to help all women feel comfortable.  The sizing chart was submitted for patent and the processed became a reality.

The next step was how to bring this great fitting underwear to the public.  She knew she could not complete with the major brands that were all doing it wrong anyway.  Amy decided to use crowdfunding to launch Amy’s Underwear.  She made a home-grown video filmed right in her living room, while the kids were at school.  She made her logo herself and bootstrapped the entire process.  She decided on a pricing model that would make it possible to create a great quality product and still leave her garments in the same ball park as others specialty underwear.  She launched her Indiegogo on her 34^th birthday of November the 6^th 2016.

Amy’s target market was every woman.  Her market was active women that love to dance and do physical activity, the woman that enjoy weight lifting and being trim and the women with a pear or an hour glass shape.  Most importantly the market was women that has spent years, if not decades, feeling uncomfortable in her own clothing.  Amy created Amy's Undies, with it's tag-line 'I love big Butts' to help everyone woman with this incredibly sensitive issue.

If you have resonated with this story you might be asking yourself, how can can I help, and how can I get my hands on some of those Amy’s Undies?  If you have felt that horrible feeling of your underwear riding up or fitting ill, you are the woman Amy’s Undies is meant to help.   Check out the Indiegogo site and become one of the first women to get your own Amy’s Undies.  You can also help by sharing this campagin with family and friends and even getting a pair for a friend that has this same issue.  You can also follow Amy's Journey through social media on facebook.

Amy’s Underwear has an initial target of $15,000 to bring this dream into reality. The initial release will be underwear in 15 sizes and in bikini, boy-shorts, and cheeky styles. Check out the styles here.  If you are wondering which sizes you are check out this sizing video.   She has created stretch goals that include 9 more plus sizes, and a rainbow of color options.  Supporting this dream can be done easily enough and can result in the first good fitting underwear you have ever had.

So if you Love Big Butts, or have this same issue, support Amy's Undies and lets make change to fit all women where it counts.

Story told by Buzz Well Media.